2008, Goodbye and Good Riddance

I cannot tell you how excited I am that 2008 is over.


It was a year full of ups and downs in work and personal life, more adversity than I have ever faced both physically and mentally, and probably the most personal growth I’ve ever seen (for more information, see blog post Happy Anniversary!). It was, overall, exhausting, leading me to end it not by ringing in the new year, like most people did, but by doing what one does best when exhausted – going to be early. Yes, I “slept” in the new year. But I think it was an appropriate farewell to 2008. “Goodbye year. I really don’t want to live more of you than I have to, so I’m going to go to bed instead of seeing you through.”

Alright, I don’t need to be so harsh on last year. Considering how much it taught me, it deserves a little more credit. But still, I am glad it’s over.

Fall 2008
Since I didn’t even give you all an update on the last three months of 2008, I’ll try to sum it up quickly. The end of September saw one of my biggest projects and greatest successes here so far. With the help of Reef Check (an international organization dedicated to protecting coral reefs all over the world), I held a two-day kids’ marine education camp called “Estrellas del Mar” (Translation: Stars of the Sea, aka “Starfish”). We educated local children from Villa Padre Nuestro and Bayahibe about protecting marine life and preserving the ocean and the environment in general. We played games, fished for plankton, tracked currents, watched a documentary on reefs, went snorkeling, painted a mural on the school wall and more. It was fun, but a lot of work. And due to the lack of disciplinary structure in classroom settings, the kids were at times a bit difficult. But the kids LOVED it. They still ask me when we’re going to do it again. “Un dia, si Dios quiere,” (One day, God-willing) I tell them. Sidenote: “Si Dios quiere” is the ultimate Dominican copout for “it ain’t happening, sister,” so when I hear that, I know there’s a pretty good chance that Fulano isn’t showing up to the meeting I’ve planned. I hope they get the hint.

After the camp, the next big project I worked on was an art exhibition in La Romana for all of the artisans in this zone. We invited local store owners and street vendors to the art fair, as a way of introducing them to the local artists and the products they’re making, in hopes that we’d make some connections for some steady market opportunities. I worked hard, hand delivering invitations to all local gift shops and trying to promote the fair. It went pretty well. There were a decent number of people that attended, but it wasn’t the turnout I had anticipated. Luckily we had help (read: transportation costs and rental costs for the fair) from the Secretary of Tourism, so it came at no cost to our artisans. Next time, though, I know to be more persistent with the invitees and perhaps enlist some help from locals, offer some free incentives, etc. It was a good lesson.

After that fair, I worked arduously to sell my artisan products wherever I went, including at the Peace Corps volunteer Thanksgiving celebration (several volunteers gave me a hard time for working during a holiday party… I was tempted to point out that I had just taken their money… who is the dumber one here? Besides my artisans were happy with the sales, which was more important to me than eating more turkey or drinking cervezas), a couple of fairs through the Embassy in Santo Domingo, the Peace Corps office, our one-year IST (in-service training), and finally… at home. I realize that this sort of activity isn’t exactly teaching sustainability – which, no doubt, is a Peace Corps goal – but I couldn’t really give up these opportunities to make money for my friends. And each time I brought money back for them, our weekly artisan meetings were somehow so much more enjoyable.

I think I should pause here to thank all of you back home who purchased artisan products from me over the holidays. We made a total of US$750 (WOW!), which goes a long way down here. Because it was at no cost to my artisans (I obviously didn’t charge them for my work), all of the money we made went directly to them. And… this is the part that makes me so proud… because it was so successful, they decided (on their own; this wasn’t even my idea) to each take percentage out of their earnings and open a small bank account for the Bayahibe Artisans Association, so that they will have funds for future projects they want to realize…. So THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU for all of your support. You made a small group of people here very happy. “So, Tara,” they asked me, as I divvied up the money, “when’s your next trip home?”

The Decision
It might be hard to believe after the recount of my latest successes that I spent from August to December trying to decide if I wanted to continue my service in the Peace Corps for another year, but, as I’ve alluded to occasionally, my experience here isn’t always a rosy one. Over the past year I experienced many challenges with my project partner. In October, the issues I had with the hotel association reached a culmination, making me feel discouraged and upset about the work and projects to which I’d been assigned. This is a pretty normal experience in a volunteer’s work, but I felt morally afflicted with some of the issues, making it even more difficult to continue working with them. That, coupled with a general frustration about my living situation and weariness of living in a different culture, speaking a different language, and all other hardships of living and working in a developing country, made me strongly consider calling it quits. But after thinking about it for a couple of months, I decided what I needed was a site change (meaning Peace Corps would move me within the country to a different place). The Peace Corps staff didn’t seem to think that was a good idea. Actually, they made it clear that they would rather me ET (Early Terminate aka “quit”) and go home than switch sites, which was a difficult realization I had to face. I took some more time to think about my options and I decided that I should try to change my attitude about the situation and just suck it up for the remaining 11 months. Besides, I decided I’d rather finish what I started than quit and regret it.

That period of time was one of the most challenging in my life – issues with my project partner, then with the Peace Corps Office staff, feeling unsupported, powerless, stuck and frustrated, wanting to work, volunteer my time and life, make a difference, but feeling like I didn’t have the support or resources to do what I know I’m best at… it was just a tough situation. I’m still amazed I stuck it out, but I’m glad I did.

December 2008
So, you know how when you want something so badly, you can almost will it into being with your constant thoughts of it? That’s exactly how I felt the first week and half of December in regards to my impending trip home. As soon as December 1st hit, my mind was on the plane back to the states. The first ten days of the month I just went through the motions, keeping myself occupied to make the time go by, with my mental and physical selves in different worlds. It seemed that no matter how hard I tried to make the days pass, it felt like December 10th would never arrive. It was the longest 10 days of my life. Of course, when December 10th did finally arrive, my flight was delayed, making the trip home seem like an eternity, but at least I was finally going home. As my plane landed on the runway of JFK airport, I let out a silent squeal inside. I wanted to jump up and down and do a little dance, but it seemed inappropriate at 1:00am to exert so much energy after such a long day of travel. Besides, some of the other passengers were still asleep. My heart was pounding as I raced to meet my dad, who had driven all the way from Arkansas to pick me up (He came to help me move all my stuff, including my winter wear, out of storage in New York to Arkansas… yes, he’s a great dad). He was standing at arrivals, cute smile on his face, worn out from 2 days of driving in the rain, but so happy to see me. Tears filled my eyes as we embraced at baggage claim. Man, it felt good to be home.

December was, by far, the best month of 2008. Between my time in India (Feb.-June 2007) and my first year in the DR, it had been almost 2 full years since I had felt cold weather, seen/felt snow, worn my winter scarves and jackets, or curled up by a fire in flannel pjs. Obviously, with the exception of numerous long HOT showers (oh, how I miss hot showers), I was cold from the minute I stepped off the plane until I landed back in the DR. Even though I complained every now and then about being cold, it was so nice to feel the crispness of winter air on my face again, catch a whiff of burning wood, see my breath on the air, feel my toes go numb. I had forgotten how much I loved winter.

My vacation was spent listening to Christmas music, baking sugar cookies, sending out holiday cards, eating out, shopping for and wrapping presents, playing tennis with Dad and Lisa (as they can attest, I was bit rusty), catching up with old friends, attending holiday party after holiday party (including Lisa’s office party, at which they asked me to give a little impromptu speech about my work in the Peace Corps to a group of about 50 people whom I’d never met before… yikes! Good thing I had some wine in me.), eating all kinds of exciting food - sushi, Thai, pizza, tofu, Subway, Mexican, Starbucks southern home cooking, so much variety! (my stomach had a bit of a hard time adjusting, but she powered through it), getting lost in Wal-Mart (that place is bigger than I remembered), smoking hookah, playing games, but most of all, just having an amazing time hanging out with family. It’s never felt so good to be home. Between four different Christmases, at least four holiday parties, and visits to Little Rock and Harrison, I was pretty busy. And as if I wasn’t cramming enough in to 3 weeks, my mother surprised us with a trip to Las Vegas on the 26th!!! It was absolutely one of the best trips we’ve taken as a family. My sister, Allie, turned 21 on the 27th, so we celebrated by eating at an amazing restaurant called Tao and then getting VIP passes to the club in our hotel and dancing the night away, followed only by… gambling, of course. My brother won $765 in a poker tournament. Our friend, Carolyn, won $300 in craps. I wasn’t as successful, but I came out ahead. We walked the strip, went shopping downtown, saw a Cirque de Soliel show, ate at good restaurants, and just had a blast with each other. I’ve never felt closer to my family.


Home was so good. I needed the break. What surprised me though was how much my mentality about the way we live has changed. I guess I kind of experienced these feelings in my two previous trips home, but this trip in particular, perhaps because it was longer or maybe because it was in the middle of the biggest commercialized holiday we know, I really felt out of place. Even tucked in under my big feather comforter in a beautiful warm home with anything I could possible need just a Wal-Mart trip away, I wasn’t completely comfortable. Everything was just too easy. Life was too easy.

I’ve grown so accustomed to living with so little, to not having options, to barely getting by, and all the other everyday inconveniences that come with living in a developing country that the lifestyle with which I was all of a sudden faced didn’t seem like one I knew anymore. Furthermore, there was so much “stuff” – junk – everywhere I turned… and so many options (I’m still shocked that Doritos came out with a two-flavors-in-one bag of chips and Skittles now has chocolate flavors), that I just grew overwhelmed at times. All the things that we acquire and keep – the candle holders, picture frames, the books, mementos, clothes, souvenirs, office supplies and electronics…. There’s just too much of it. And it drove me crazy. I guess I just had a hard time facing the reality of what my life used to be, after having lived every day with people who could have really used the money spent on those unnecessary expenditures to get by in their everyday lives, to feed and cloth their kids, to pay their bills, etc. I spent so many years and money acquiring things and what good has it done me? I have 14 notebooks and 239 pens and 16 bags and 103 picture frames, 256 shirts… and my neighbor has to skip meals so her kids can eat. That just doesn’t work for me anymore.

This general discomfort drove me to start getting rid of things as soon as I could. Within the first two days of being home, I had cleaned out my entire room and part of the attic. A few trips to goodwill and several trash bags later, I felt a little bit better, but I know when I get back, I’ll be doing a reassessment.

So, December was wonderful. My vacation was about as good as it gets, and I came back to the DR renewed and refreshed. I feel so fortunate that I was able to spend that time at home. It was peaceful and fulfilling, just what I needed after a few months of turmoil. I miss my family dearly now and I am so looking forward to the next time I get to see them.